The Sour Orange

It’s like a grown-up sitting on Santa’s knee. Parents don’t take your children out with you dressed up in a Halloween costume competing with them for attention and candy – let the kids do their own trick-or-treating.

It’s the big Florida-Georgia football game today – or better known as your
drunken fans against my drunken fans. Usually the loser of the Football
game wins the drunkest fans part of the game.

Why do they have Alcoholics Anonymous? It’s never been a secret who the
drunks in my family are.

Cigarettes have gotten so expensive because of government taxes that joints
are now affordable. In the near future, potheads will be fighting
legalization of Marijuana, because they don’t want to pay a toke tax.

President Obama has cried wolf more than any other politician in my
lifetime. He needs to understand it doesn’t work anymore because thanks to
him the wolf has already knocked on the door, entered the room, and eaten
the three little pigs.

Lake County’s unemployment for September is 10.6%, but if you are one of the
folks without a job the rate is 100%. If more politicians were unemployed I
bet they’d be voting on a jobs bill today.

Today is United Nations Day, and I guess I need to send them a strongly-worded birthday letter since all they do to solve the world’s problems is talk.