The Sour Orange

If you are a politician who doesn’t support your own city’s businesses and the jobs they create well then you must be, you must be…from Leesburg.

I feel like the Lake Square Mall – slow, rundown, and empty.

Well, the teachers are starting to get prepared for classes at Leesburg High School. This week’s orientation deals with self-defense, drug interdiction, and how to stop teen pregnancy.

After last week’s Bikefest, I’ve seen enough ugly tattoos to last me a lifetime. It seems the older and larger the biker, the uglier the tattoos.

For two days these bikers have been in Leesburg raising hell, drinking hard, and smoking all kinds of funny cigarettes. Now, on Sunday morning, many of them are doing church. I didn’t realize so many bikers were Catholic.

Some of these biker chicks are really looking old. I can’t tell if they have tattoos or age spots, and most are suffering from furniture disease – their chest has dropped in their drawers.

Bikefest revs up today in Leesburg with the contest for Miss Leesburg. The winner is usually the girl who’s had the best surgery which enhances the smallest bikini top, and who can do the best impersonation of a New Orleans street walker. There are no points for poise in this pageant.