The Sour Orange

I smell gas fumes, burnt rubber and stale cigarettes mixed with beer.  That
can mean only one thing - the Daytona 500 is next week.  Let's go racing!

My old, drunk Uncle Willie claims he is a miracle worker that can turn wine
into water.  Just give him a bottle of cheap wine and about two hours of
self-processing.

Calling Jersey Shore a reality show demonstrates how much most young people
are not living in reality.

Today is just another day to me, because everyday I am with my sweetie is
Valentine's Day.

There’s a Super Bowl on today between the New York Giants and New England Patriots….yawn. This is the day I let my wife win the argument and we watch a Lifetime movie.

Whoever created a low-carb diet obviously doesn’t like pizza.

My wife loves the dog better than me because she’s has house-broken him. I refuse to obey, so I get no love treats.